I am addicted to throwing Pawns into rivers in Dragon’s Dogma 2 and you can’t stop me

Although the Pawns are chatter-boxes, they are beloved by all Dragon’s Dogma 2 players due to their unwavering loyalty and utility. An asset in exploration and combat, purposefully harming them wouldn’t cross the minds of many.

But, I must say, it can be hilarious.

Picking up anyone you want is funny enough

One thing I couldn’t believe I had the power to do when starting Dragon’s Dogma 2 was to pick up anyone I seemingly wanted. Most NPCs never appreciated the gesture, not that they’d resist me just slinging them over my shoulder.

When I found out this extended to enemies, I was blown away. Sure, you can’t just pick up an enemy as they’ll have to be weakened or prone first, but it’s possible. I quickly moved on from my great powerful Thief antics to simply picking enemies up and lobbing them off cliffs or into rivers.

The moment I properly acknowledged that the bodies of deep water would eliminate any opponent thanks to the Brine, it became my ultimate weapon when venturing through Vermund.

This brought me great satisfaction and is where my crusade began.

Pawns will never oppose the whims of the Arisen, even when picking them up with the intent to throw them. They may squeak out their disapproval when aiming where to throw them, but they won’t push you away. This is great for reaching further away places to get loot, but also provided a means to extend my newly acquired entertainment.

What do you get when you cross a whole people who won’t resist me picking them up, and an indomitable force residing in a lake?

Is that a Pawn over there? In the river they go

Let me get something straight – I will never throw any Pawns in my party into a river or off a cliff. I don’t know if that will absolve me of my sins, but it’s something.

When I see an approaching Pawn, I simply can’t resist the urge to grab them and throw them into a river. Every single time. It’s hilarious.

I do feel a twinge of guilt if they hail me for offering their services, but if I’m happy with my crew, then into the river they go.

Even if they don’t talk to me. Into the river they go.

Helped me with a battle? Into the river they go.

Dared to be within viewing distance? Into the river they go.

So if you’re the Arisen of Legolass, then I hate to say it, but I have personally thrown her off a bridge in Vermund. She may not wish to travel thereabouts anymore.

I don’t know exactly what it is, but seeing them plummet before they crash into the river just makes me giggle. Try it before you judge me.

If you’d like to seek revenge, then I suppose you can hail my Pawn, Dull Craize, whose ID is RDDD74BII26N for PC players only. I would apologize to console players, but their Pawns are safe from my clutches.

Perhaps it’s the unwavering loyalty and innocence in their eyes before I heft them over my shoulders that sparks humor, or the simple ease of it all. I don’t know many other games where I get to callously mistreat the loyal beings around me without any consequence whatsoever.

Whatever it is, I strongly recommend you give it a try. There are more than entertainment reasons to want to throw a Pawn off a cliff, considering how chatty they are, however.